Take Me On Your Mighty Wings Across the Sky

They say freak,
When you're singled out,
The red,
Well it filters through.

So lay down,
The threat is real,
When his sight,
Goes red again.

Seeing red again,
Seeing red again.

This change,
He won't contain,
Slip away,
To clear your mind,
When asked,
Who made it show (who made it show),
The truth,
He gives into most.

So lay down,
The threat is real,
When his sight,
Goes red again.

So lay down,
The threat is real,
When his sight,
Goes red again.

So lay down,
The threat is real,
When his sight,
Goes red again.

Seeing red again!
Seeing red again!
Seeing red again!
Seeing red again!
Seeing red again!
Seeing red again!
Seeing red again!
Seeing red!!!

They say freak, When you're singled out,
The red, it filters through.

-- chevelle the red

well im feeling pretti hyper and happy, like i was a long time ago. people were supposed to hang out with me but instead decided that their boyfriends were a better choice. ive felt like the normal people i roll with feel like im not good enough to hang out with anymore. theres more than one person. it pisses me off more than hurts me... because im sick of the petty shit. i have mind enough to tell off two people who were supposed to be my close friends, ya know the kind, the "ill be there no matter what"... well it turned out that the friendship should really be called " ill be there until I find someone better to be with " theyve dropped me. im not gonna be there when they turn around to pick me up, when they need me because they got burned. im sick of this shit. i was talking to people in the PLAB yesterday morning and as i was talking one of my "friends" looked at me and gave me this look of total disgust. ive never felt more betrayed. i feel like the people who are supposed to like me because we're friends have left me out to dry. " a good friend stabs you in the front " im finally starting to believe in myself -- i like Me, except for the fact that im ugly -- im pretti ok. and everyone else has given up on me. and im just gonna have to find new people... im gonna have to wonder the earth alone for awhile...."the lonely position of neutral" i do feel betrayed. and i feel alone. deep down i know some day it will be better. i wont give up, just because everyone else has.

"just dig a hole and throw dirt on me"

im alone and im almost happy. im kinda living. im feeling good. kings to me and you... im not going to the dance so if anyone else is free, seriously, lets do sumthing friday nite... im in a great mood and i wanna hang out... hit up the cell if you're free...732 754 2615.

ive been smiling lately. good times, huh. i wanna hug everyone. haha.

one scary thing is wat he told me. i love that kid like a brother and im scared that hes gonna fuck himself up.

well, on to better times.

Richard : " im swimming back to the house of death, on a dead body "

Larry : " i think im getting swimmer's ear, Richard."

--weekend at bernies--

Part of me won’t go away
Everyday reminded how much I hate it
Weighted against the consequences
Can’t live without it so it’s senseless
Wanna cut it out of my soul
And just live with a gaping hole
Take control of my life
And wash out all the burnt taste
I made the problems in the first place
Hang my head low ‘cause it’s part of me
Ya hardly see right next to the heart of me
Heard of me the routine scar
New cuts cover where the old ones are
And now I’m sick of this
I can’t stand the sandpaper thoughts that grade on my sanity
I rather not even be then the man that’s staring in the mirror through me



Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me
Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me
Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me
Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me



I feel it everyday
I feel I made my way
I feel it swell up inside, swell up inside
Swallowing me



Freedom can be frightening if you’ve never felt it
Once it’s been dealt with you feel like you’ve been touched by something angelic
And then melted down into a pool of peace
Cease to be the animal you used to be
Remove the broken parts you know were wrong
And feel the calm when the problem’s all gone
And then you start to see another piece of yourself that you can’t let be
Memories of the last fight to free yourself
Take it to the depths of the bottom of the well
And now you know you can choose to lose the part in your heart
Where your insides bruise
You can live if you’re willing to
Put a stop to just what’s killing you



Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me
Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me
Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me
Cut myself free willingly
Stop just what’s killing me



I feel it everyday
I feel I made my way
I feel it swell up inside, swell up inside
Swallowing me



Alive in me, inside of me, a part of me screams away silently (repeats w/ next line...)
This part of me won’t go away, part of me won’t go away



Everywhere I look around I see how everything aught to be
Every time I see myself there’s always something wrong with me



I feel it everyday
I feel I made my way
I feel it swell up inside, swell up inside
Swallowing me
I feel it everyday
I feel I made my way
I feel it swell up inside, swell up inside
Swallowing me



I feel it swell up inside, swell up inside, swallowing me
I feel it swell up inside, swell up inside, swallowing me

Lp Part of Me


IM FEELING SOMEWHAT BETTER.... HAH WHO'DA THUNK?!